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Wednesday, August 31, 2005::

Picture Time

I have regular Amy pictures. and injury pictures. For the highly squemish or the faint hearted I will post the regular pictures first. :p

Silly Stuff:














NOW. For the injury pictures. After my surguries, after the stitches have been removed . . . with my brace off of my ankle for the pictures. Here you go:












The End. XB

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 9:43 PM:-

Huzzah!

First really good news as of late! My stitches are all out (all 20-30+ of them x.x) and I have a walking boot on my ankle (although I'm still not allowed to WALK on it. I am however able to take it off and shower) And here's the awesome thing . . . My arm has NOTHING on it. No cast, no splint, no brace. The only thing on my arm riht now is tape over the incision, blue ink (surgen maps :p) and yellow iodine. I don't think I'm suppose to really be USING my arm yet, but I am suppose to stretch my joints and flex and stuff. My skin is so wrinkly and dry. My ankle is horribly bruised and kinda swolen. Definaely mixed with the blue ink and yellow iodine. I had three different incisions on my ankle and one on my arm. One of the incisions on my ankle and the incision on my arm look like they're going to be kinda ugly scars . . . Alas. But the good news is that my arm is free and i start physical therepy in 4 weeks. *dances . . . you know, figurativly*

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 2:01 PM:-

NEVER AGAIN!

So I'm listening to Nickelback right now . . . I forgot how much I liked them. I bet they're bad for me. Depressing lyrics afterall. The last thing I need to do is go back to the way I was before. It does bring back memories . . . memories of a numb zombie-faced human with the violent urge to strike out. Temptation to sink into the darkness . . . with the bloodshot eyes from the nightmares, and the spiked coker to fiend off preditors (too coward to confront others), dependant on my jacket to cover my arms even in the summertime (a device to cover for my own insecurities).
Death feels welcoming compared to living . . . I explained that when you live you have to trust God. Sometimes, though, you want so bad to put your trust in man.
But you can't.
Not with your life.
When you walk in death you are without God . . . but you have 10,000 bodies around you to keep you company.

To walk in darkness is to feel good and even addicted to the pain and screaming emmitting from your very being. You want to lash out, cut, pop, inhale, drown in, die . . .
To walk in the light is to give up everything, struggle constantly, sometimes feel without human companionship and to save man in anyway you can.

I would be a very different person if I'd never gotten out of the Dark. But just because I got out doesn't mean I couldn't ever put myself there again, somewhere in the back of my mind there is a potential murdurer. If there was one sin in my mind that I was never more guilty of . . . it's murder.

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 2:57 AM:-

The Moody Effects

I did it. I finninshed the 6th Harry Potter book "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince". I found out who dies . . . and the only words that seem to come to my mind are "*sob* Noo!" and "..wow.." Many plot events occured that I did not want to happen . . . and many happened that I did not expect. I am now led to believe that there will be more than seven books in total.

Either way, I always notice how my mood seems to always become entangled in the mood of the book itself. And I seem to be dazed in it in such a way that I would indeed believe that I could be the main character. Although saddly in this case, I do not certainly have the amount of bravery emmitting from Harry's character, but then again, I've never had to. it's kind of annoying . . . the moody daze I get in after reading a book. I then seem to become somehow disapointed in my own unadventurous life. My own weaknesses, my causious approach to life. My carefulness in every word as to not disturb the peace of fragile tempers and opinions. I've always (or nearly always) acted as the peace-maker. But in honest to God truth my spirit irks for a great disturbance . . . but somehow God knows me best that I am not prepared for disturbances. I'm too prone to cowardace and depression. I'm too afraid of angry people, or of dislike, or of pain. And that is what makes me less of a person than I truly wish to be. Perhaps I'd just not ready for my ultimate test . . . But maybe I will be someday.

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 6:16 PM:-

HP

The latest Harry Potter book has been keeping me entertained as of late . . . I'm on about page 425 right now. Still don't know who dies . . . *moves back to couch*

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 2:45 PM:-

BARAKA

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 2:49 PM:-

Post

aaugh, its so hard to post/type. I survived surgury, for some reason i had a block (epidural) local anesthesiea and general anesthesiea. ??? Yeah, Amy had a tube down her throat. I ended up staying two nights because i was in a lot of pain and they were giving me so much pain medicine and i felt sick and i started running a fever. um, then i kept trying to talk and no one could understand me and i was so upset and grumpy. i left the next day, i'm feeling better now.

It finally happened...Nathan left me for Sam Houston State University. He's gone. Way up there in his dorm being all 21 and free and hanging out with his friend/roommate Mark Shockley. I miss him...

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 6:43 PM:-

tomorrow

i go into surgury tomorrow at 9:30am, and i have to be at Herman at 7:30am. harsh. anyway, i got some pictures for you....just a couple...

top view...thats whats left of my passengers seat


me and nathan. nathan looking angry


yar

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 10:32 PM:-

The Extent
-broken left arm
-broken left leg
-broken left ankle bones
-possible damage to my right hip (going to be x-rayed today)

i'm all in splints and in a wheelchair, lol. Ross called me a cripple at church on sunday and i laughed. :p
i'm having surgury on my ankle and my arm later this week, right as of this moment it is schedualed for my graduation day. o.O we'll try to change that.}

records that broke:
-never breaking a bone
-never flown in anything
-havn't thorn up in over 9 years

At least Nathan's car went out with a bang! :p

EDIT

my hip is not broken, we had it X-rayed. its just really REALLY sore. also when i saw the Xrays Dr. Torres said that i still had a bit of my growth-plates left. Woo! growth!

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 9:51 AM:-

Alive

I guess I'd just like to state that i'm alive and in pretty good spirits, thank you to all of you guys who prayed and sent flowers. :) <3

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 3:32 PM:-

Misconceptions

I really do (usually) love Shakespearian plays. Not really for their wordiness, but for their stories. Shakespear probably defines human misconception the best of all playwriters I can remember (which isn't much, but still). Like life, where one person gains misconceptions from hearing partial bits of informaiton, but never the full truth, this is turn causes the character to do things or act in ways they normally wouldn't. Or for instance misconception could be created by a character (such as Iago in the play "Othello") who's purpose is to destroy a person and therefore their acts cause purposeful misinterpretation. However, unlike in the end of Othello, many times we do not even begin to understand where the misinformation came from. Was it something we heard and took too literally? Was it inward hate or partial information? Or are these misconceptions being inserted by someone we trust? Lies by partial information on their behalf or lies to cover up their own wrong doings?
I suppose lately a lot of my relationships have felt misconception lately. It's extremely frustrating to know that SOMEONE has lied to you. It's also angering when people become angry at you for something they took too literal in your or someone else's words, or are too foolish and selfish to listen to what the other has to say fully before making a decision. It's angering when you tell someone the truth and they are too prideful and arrogant to believe you. And it is very unerving to have someone swear and rave at you for pouring out your mind and opinion without the intention of lecturing. I suppose I shall keep my mind inward...no. They don't deserve anything I have in me, because they do not value me as a person or a friend as much as I have them at one point in time. I'm tired with feeling like I'm so undeserving, for once other people are undeserving. And whether they care or not, I really don't. If they can be happy living in their misconceptions than good for them.
And if anyone causes me to have any misconceptions of my own and I find out the truth, I will personally kick the snot out of their brains with my foot. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's my decision. Justice for everyone. Squee.

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 4:26 PM:-

Alas, Yar

Alas, I return with four new shirts, a new pair of shoes aaand...some other stuff.

However, I would like to inform this post that I had a TERRIBLE time shopping, but that I was doing pretty good at not becoming overly frustrated by the act of finding clothes. However, shopping with parents is a pain in the arse.

1. Male parent (the father) first of all does not make me comfortable when I'm shopping anyway, especially when I'm shopping for a bra and he's in the isle with me. @_@
2. Female parent (the mom) get frustrated when we have to wait for anything.
3. Both parents constantly have a high tention and are ready to explode at eachother at any time. and they did.
4. Neither parent understands anything about the difference ebtween what I like adn what THEY like.
5. Male parent gets pissed off when I said I didn't really like anything at Academy and screams, "THERE ARE PLENTY OF GOOD COTHES HERE! LOOK AT THAT YELLOW SHIRT OVER THERE!" [insert nasty, big, white-and-yellow striped shirt] Amy: *winces* and then he flips out and says that i'm not even trying and then explodes on my mom in the car, and demands to be taken home.


You may be wondering why my dad was even shopping with us in the first place. Well the thing is . . . my dad got a loan isntead of usinng a credit card, and all the money was in an account that only he can touch (not even my mom).

So much for equality. He treats my mom like garbage. Today I wished that she would leave him. They're nto actually married. When someone treats you like that--you are NOT married, my friend. Although her lack of money restrains her. CRAP.

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 3:47 PM:-

Another head hangs lowly,
A child is slowly taken.
And the violence caused such silence.
Who are we mistaken?

But you see, it's not me,
It's not my family.
In your head, in your head,
They are fighting,
With their tanks and their bombs
and their bombs and their guns,
In your head, in your head
They are crying.

In your head, in your head
Zombie Zombie Zombie
What's in your head, in your head
Zombie Zombie Zombie?
-part of "Zombie" by The Cranberries

Yes, that's my title. o_O. do do do. So everything's been all KABAM! lately, like in my brain...because I have sooo much to do.

For instance, getting the comic up and running is eating my brain. And a comic means I need to draw probably at least 4 or 5 comics within the next few weeks. Sounds easy right? Makes me wonder why I am not doing a comedy... I mean I know the basic story of my comic, I know where most of my characters are going to be in the end . . . it's that creamy middle filling that makes people fat though. I honeslty wish my art was better suited. But ti's not really the drawing of the comics themselves that are eating me . . . it's the actual keenspace/comicgenesis thing. And the fact thatn it takes an entire day for anything to update. When I edit things i like them to BAM! be there and changed . . . but on this i have to wait a day to see if I got it right. o.O *eats her arm off*

Another instance, Rahcel's party is today, so I have some major sucking up to do before I ask my parents. Why am I online then? Blah. Who knows. la la la.

I also have a research paper to write this weekend. BLAH, the most dredded paper of all. However my last day of summer session II ends on Wednesday. W00t! Everybody par-tay! Amy will Graduate August 18th! And unlike all those other NORMAL graduates, I won't get much money or presents >.> That's if I get /anything/. Well, I'll get a $2000 sholarship . . . for more school. Woo. @_@

Also this weekend is TAX FREE WEEKEND. And we know that that means...Amy gets clothes! Well, shirts. And probably only a small amount of them. >.> ugh. I want to go through my clothes and bag up what I don't want anymore.I want to see how much clothes I actually HAVE and wear...maybe i'll do that today. That'll help clean my room . . . Last year I only got 1 shirt for back-to-school, because "Everything still fit me". Ugh. I hated it (not the shirt...the just...lack of new shirts, and i didn't complain because my parents are so uptight about money.) I honestly hate looking so childish all the time. That's not to say that I want to wear whore's clothes or anything. I'm just sick of only being able to buy T-shirts because everything else is low-cut (i have no boobs) or just generally doens't fit. Nathans knows about my shopping hedaches. I got shopping . . . Glare at everything, get angry and upset and give up like 1,000.99 times.


Zombie Zombie Zombie

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 12:46 PM:-

I wish you'd unclench your fist, and unpack your suitcase. Lately there's been too much of this.

The title, which is song lyrics, has nothing to do with this post.

So you may win, afterall, Nathan. I finally logged into keenspace. I'm trying to figure it out.

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 1:50 PM:-

A Check Up

Family
Thigns with my family has quieted down . . . for now. My dad hasn't talked to me about colleges since, and my mom support me in my decision in my career choice EVEN if it doens't make over $100,0000. My uncle came over form Lousiana the other day and stayed with us. He recently found out that he has colon cancer and will be having surgury in about a week. While my uncle was here he basically put my dad to work, they fixed everything in the house that they possibly had time to fix. O_O (My uncle is a carpender you see, and my dad is just lazy) My dad didn't WANT to do any of the work, but out of guilt he did anyway. We also ate good while he was here. My uncle should stay more often. Which appearently might happen. My uncle has 3 months off of work because he's having surgury soon, and my dad mentioned something about my uncle staying with us for a month while he recovers from his surgury. Although my uncle is a very nice guy and pretty funny, I am a bit worried about where we're going to put him. I have to acknowledge that my brother will not be happy sleeping on the couch for a month. And even if my uncle fixes everything in our house, eventually my dad would crack and get upset at having to do labor. And I certainly don't want my uncle feeling bad about it. My dad likes a lot of "alone time" *twitch* so having my uncle constantly ehre would probably cause a lot of tension. As for the rest of them . . . Becca plays outside all day and my brother . . . doesn't. Also my brother was sick this past weekend. Alas, that sums up my family.

Friends
Eh. I've talked enough about this. Nathan and I are still doing great. I <3 Nathan :)

School
I took a test today over poety. I didn't do that great, but I passed. I did better than I thought I would. I'm scared of next semester. The play at the college is well . . . I havn't watched much of it, normally i just stand backstage and talk to people. Wee.

Food
So I've been craving a lot of things this past few weeks. Food has been a big thing for me. I have had a lot of excellent toast lately. I have also had a lot of mexican food. I <3 Mexican food. I also love seafood but i've yet to get that . . . >.> I have been craving chicken fried steak for a while. And one day I wanted sausage, though God knows why! I generally can't eat sausage! I tend to crave meat--I'm not really a sweettooth type of person. I'm a carny-vore! <,< *hmm*
I have a couple fo jolly-ranchers if anyone wants them . . . they hurt my teeth . . . they're also both grape. And I don't like grape . . .
I'm going to go . . . eat toast. Maan.

-: Amy Kelley blogged it up at 1:00 PM:-